Ukuhlakanipha ngokomzwelo: ukuthi kuyini, izinhlobo, izinzuzo, kanye nemisho engcono kakhulu yokukuthuthukisa

Eminyakeni yamuva nje, ochwepheshe abaningi baye babambisana ukuthola incazelo enengqondo yakho konke okwenzekayo kithi; isibonelo, imizwa, enesizathu sokuvezwa, futhi impendulo yabizwa. "Ukuhlakanipha kwemizwa", igama elithi, nakuba lalisetshenziswa eminyakeni eminingana edlule, lathandwa kakhulu ngenxa yokushicilelwa kwencwadi ngu Daniel Goleman, eyayinegama elifanayo nesihloko sayo.

Ngenxa yokuduma lesi sihloko esikuzuzile enkathini egcwele osomabhizinisi nabantu abanentshisekelo yokuzithuthukisa nokuthuthukisa njengabantu ngabanye, sinqume ukunikela ngesihlabathi sethu ngokungena okuphelele ngokwanele. Lapha uzothola ukuthi ukuhlakanipha ngokomzwelo kuyini, izinhlobo zako, izinzuzo zakho, indlela yokuyithuthukisa ezimweni ezahlukene kanye neqoqo elikhulu lemisho yokukukhuthazaSithemba ukuthi uzokujabulela ukuyifunda.

Buyini ubuhlakani bezemizwa?

Incazelo yaleli gama iyinkolelo, ngoba kunophenyo oluningi nemibono mayelana nalo. Noma kunjalo, ingachazwa njenge- ikhono lokuqonda kanye nobudlelwano ukuthi abantu kufanele baqaphele, baqonde futhi balawule imizwa yabo; ngendlela efanayo naleyo abakwazi ngayo ukuqaphela, ukuqonda nokuthonya eyabanye.

Ngamanye amazwi, ukuhlakanipha kwemizwa (EI) yikona ikhono lokubona, ukuqonda nokulawula imizwa yakho neyabanyeKuhlanganisa indlela esicabanga ngayo ngalokho esikuzwayo, indlela esisebenzisa ngayo ulwazi oluthinta imizwa ukwenza izinqumo, kanye nendlela esixhumana ngayo nabanye abantu nsuku zonke.

Ukuhlakanipha ngokomzwelo kuvela esidingweni sokukwazi ukuhlola umuntu ngokuphelele ngokwengqondo, njengoba ukuhlakanipha kulinganisa (quotient ehlakaniphileAbazange bahlole ukuthi umuntu wayeyiqonda futhi eyazisa kanjani imizwa yakhe noma imizwa yakhe, noma eyabanye. Lokhu kwakuyinto uHoward Gardner ayisho encwadini yakhe ethi "Multiple Intelligences: The Theory in Practice," eyanyatheliswa emashumini eminyaka edlule, lapho ethula khona, phakathi kwezinye izinto, i- Ubuhlakani bomuntu (ukuziqonda) kanye Ubuhlakani phakathi kwabantu (ukuqonda abanye).

Kwaze kwaba maphakathi nawo-1980 lapho leli gama labonakala khona kakhulu ngethisisi kaWayne Payne, yize ubuhlakani bemizwa base bukhulunywe kakade emashumini eminyaka adlule nguBeldoch noLeuner. Kodwa-ke, ukuqwashisa umphakathi okwandile kwafika encwadini kaDaniel Goleman, esikhulume ngayo ekuqaleni kwalesi sihloko; le ncwadi yaba nomthelela omkhulu futhi yavumela i-EI ukuthi isetshenziswe ezimweni ezahlukene. ezokwelapha, ezemfundo, zomsebenzi kanye nezemidlalo.

Emashumini eminyaka ambalwa edlule, izifundo eziningi zikhombisile ukuthi ukuba nobuhlakani ngokomzwelo kuhlobene impilo yengqondo ethuthukisiwe, inhlalakahle yengqondo engcono, kanye nokusebenza okungcono ezindaweni ezahlukene, kusukela ebudlelwaneni obuseduze kuya ebuholini ezinhlanganweni.

Ngokusho kukaDaniel Goleman uqobo, kuyadingeka ukuqonda ukuthi ubuchopho busebenza kanjani ukuthola ukuthi amandla imizwa enayo ngaphezu kwemicabango yethuUchaza ukuthi “sinezingqondo ezimbili”: enye ecabangayo nenye ezwayo, nokuthi ubuchopho obungokomzwelo busabela ngokushesha kakhulu emcimbini kunobuchopho obunengqondo. Ngakho-ke, ukufunda ukuphatha lelo gagasi lokuqala lemizwa Kuyisihluthulelo sokwenza izinqumo ezihlakaniphile.

Izinhlobo ngokusho kukaDaniel Goleman: izingxenye ezi-5 eziyinhloko

Ukuhlakanipha ngokomzwelo kungahlukaniswa kube izakhi ezinhlanu zakudala, ezachazwa nguDaniel Goleman njenge ukuzazi, ukuzithiba ngokomzwelo, ukuzikhuthaza, uzwela, namakhono okuxhumana nabantu. Lezi zingxenye ezinhlanu okwamanje zihlukaniswe ngezizinda ezine ezinkulu ezisetshenziswa kabanzi kwi-psychology esebenzayo:

• Ukuzazi: ukwazi ukuthi sizizwa kanjani nokuthi kungani.
• Ukuzilawula: lawula lokho esikuzwayo futhi senze ngendlela eguquguqukayo.
• Unembeza womphakathi: ukuqonda imizwa yabanye abantu kanye nomongo.
• Ukuphathwa kobudlelwano: ukuthonya, ukuxhumana nokudala ubudlelwano obuhle.

Lezi zinto zingahluka kakhulu ngokuya nge- ubuntu bomuntu ngamunye ngisho nangobulili; isibonelo, ezimweni eziningi amadoda ayazi kangcono ezicini ezithile zokuziphatha, kuyilapho abesifazane bevame ukuthola amaphuzu aphezulu ngamakhono afana... uzwela oluvezayoKodwa-ke, okuboniswa ucwaningo ukuthi Wonke la makhono angaqeqeshwakungakhathaliseki ubulili noma ubudala.

Ukuzazi wena (ukuzazi)

Yikhono umuntu analo lokubona imizwa yakhe, kanye nokuqonda ukuthi lokhu kuyithonya kanjani imicabango yakhe noma inhlalakahle yakhe iyonke. Ngamanye amazwi, kuyikhono uzazi wenaukuqaphela kokubili amandla (izimfanelo noma amakhono) kanye nobuthakathaka.

Amakhono angaphansi abalulekile Ukuzazi kuhlanganisa:

• Ukuthola imizwa emzimbeni (ukucindezeleka, ukuphefumula, ukushisa, ifindo esiswini).
• Ukusho lokho okuzwayo (intukuthelo, ukukhungatheka, ithemba, ihlazo, ukwesaba).
• Ukuqonda izinto ezibangela imizwaNgamanye amazwi, yiziphi izimo ezivame ukukubangela.
• Qaphela ukuthi imizwa yakho injani Zithonya izinqumo zakho kanye nokuziphatha kwakho.

Uma wazi ukuthi ungasho kanjani ukuthi “Ngiyesaba ngoba ngizoziveza,” noma “Ngizizwa ngithukuthele ngoba ngibona lesi simo njengesingalungile,” Uthola ukucaca futhi awuzivumeli ukuba uthathwe yizifiso ezingaboni.

Ukulawula imizwa yakho (ukuzilawula)

Waziwa ngokuthi ukuzithiba noma ukuzithiba ngokomzweloYisici esinomthwalo wemfanelo wokulawula nokuzindla ngemizwa noma imizwa yethu, ngenhloso yokuthi ingakwazi ukulawula imicabango nezenzo zethu.

Empeleni, yikhono esinalo lokuqonda ukuthi kungani sizizwa ngaleyo mizwa futhi funda ukulawula ukuqina kwayo ngezikhathi ezidingekayo, njengoba ngokuvamile uma ziqinile kakhulu sigcina sizisola ngokusho noma ukwenza into ebesingeke sifune ukuyenza ukube bekungengenxa yokuthi imizwa yayithonya ukuziphatha nokucabanga kwethu.

Ukuzilawula ngokomzwelo akusho ukuthi “cindezela"akukho"susa"imizwelo. Ngokuphambene nalokho, kusho ukuthi:

• nika indawo kulokho esikuzwayo ngaphandle kokuphika.
• Usar amasu okulawula anempilo (phefumula kakhulu, khuluma, bhala, cela usizo).
• Gwema imizwa efana nentukuthelo, umuzwa wecala, noma ukwesaba ukuphanga izinqumo zethu.
• Ukululama ngokushesha ngemva kwengxabano noma ukwehluleka (ukuqina).

Njengoba uBruce Lee eshilo, imizwa ingaba yisitha uma sizivumela ngokuphelele futhi senza ngaphandle konembeza. Thuthukisa ukuzilawula Kukuvumela ukuthi "ube munye nemizwa yakho," esikhundleni sokuba ngaphansi kwesandla sabo.

Ukuzikhuthaza

Kuhlanganisa ukwazi ukugxila emizweni ngendlela ezuzisayo, okungukuthi, ukuzibekela umgomo noma inhloso nokwazi ukuthi singaqondisa kanjani ukunaka kuwo; ukuze sikwazi ukuzikhuthaza.

Ungasho ukuthi yi- ithemba elingokoqobo okungaguquguquki nokunengqondo (nakuba ngezinye izikhathi kuphambene nomqondo), kanye namandla isinyathelo somuntu siqu lokho kusenza siqhubekele phambili ngendlela eyakhayo ukuze sikhule ezicini ezahlukene zokuphila kwethu.

Ukuzikhuthaza kuzibonakalisa ngezindlela eziningana ukuziphatha okubonakalayo:

• Amandla qhubeka nomzamo naphezu kobunzima.
• Ukuthambekela kokubona amaphutha njengalawo amathuba okufundahhayi njengokwehluleka okuphelele.
• Umkhuba wokuxhumana ne- inhloso yomuntu siqu ("isizathu" salokho okwenzayo).
• Ukusebenzisa imizwa emihle (injabulo, ilukuluku, ukubonga) njengoba uphethiloli wangaphakathi.

Uma uthi “Ngingathuthuka, nawe ungathuthuka,” usuke usebenzisa umbono wokukhula okuyinto, njengoba ochwepheshe abaningi besho, eyingxenye ebalulekile yobuhlakani bemizwa banamuhla.

Uzwela (ukuqwashisa ngomphakathi)

Yiyo evumela ukuqaphela imizwa nemizwa yabanye abantu, ezivame ukudluliselwa ngokungazi. Kungabizwa futhi ngokuthi "ubuhlakani obuphakathi kwabantu", obekungenye yezinto uHoward Gardner abalule ukuthi wayengeke akwazi ukukala izinkomba zobuhlakani ezifana quotient ehlakaniphile.

Namuhla kuyaqashelwa ukuthi uzwela luhlanganisa okungenani izilinganiso ezintathu ezihambisanayo:

• Uzwela oluqondayo: ukuqonda ukuthi omunye umuntu ucabangani ngalokho abhekene nakho.
• Uzwela olungokomzwelo: ukuzwa ngezinga elithile lokho omunye umuntu akuzwayo, ukuxhumana ngokomzwelo.
• Uzwela olunesihawu: engeza kulokhu okungenhla isifiso sokuthi ukunciphisa ukuhlupheka noma usizo.

Umuntu okwaziyo ukubona, ukuqonda, nokuthonya imizwa yabanye abantu une- kulula kakhulu ekusunguleni izixhumanisi nabo; ngaphezu kwalokho, abantu abanozwela yibo abanamakhono amakhulu okwenza ukuhlakanipha kwengqondoImisho efana nokuthi "Ngiyakuqonda futhi ngiyakukhathalela" noma "unelungelo lokuzizwa ngale ndlela" iyizibonelo ezicacile zozwela olusebenzayo.

Amakhono okuxhumana nabantu (ukuphathwa kobudlelwano)

I-Las ubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu Ziyinto eyisisekelo nebalulekile ekukhuleni okulungile komuntu; ngoba lokhu kunethonya elikhulu enjabulweni, ekukhiqizeni nasekukhuleni komuntu.

Lesi sici sibhekisela ngokungaqondile kuzwela, oludingekayo ukuze kwakhiwe ubudlelwano obunjalo; ngendlela efanayo nokuthi isici esidingekayo ukuthuthukisa i-IE yethu ngezizathu ezichazwe ngenhla.

Phakathi kwamakhono okuxhumana nabantu ahlobene kakhulu nokuhlakanipha ngokomzwelo yile:

• Ukuxhumana okuqinisekisayo: veza lokho okucabangayo nokuzizwayo ngaphandle kokuhlasela noma ukuzithoba.
• Ukulawula ukungqubuzana: ukuthola izixazululo lapho bonke abantu bengathola khona okuthile.
• Ithonya elihleUkukhuthaza, ukukhuthaza kanye nokuphakamisa ngaphandle kokuphoqelela noma ukukhohlisa.
• Umsebenzi wethimba: ukuzizwa uyingxenye yeqembu, ubambisana futhi ugubha impumelelo efanayo.
• Ikhono lokuxolisa nokubonga: vuma amaphutha bese ubonisa ukwazisa.

Izinzuzo zokuhlakanipha ngokomzwelo empilweni yakho

Ngaphandle kwemfundiso, umbuzo oyinhloko uthi: Iyini inhloso yokuthuthukisa ubuhlakani bemizwa? Izifundo ezahlukahlukene kanye nokuhlangenwe nakho kwezokwelapha kubonisa izinzuzo eziningana eziqondile kakhulu:

• Kusenza sazane kangcono.Ukuzazi kuyisihluthulelo sokuzethemba kwethu nokuzethemba.
• Kusisiza senze izinqumo ezingconongoba sicabanga ngokucacile futhi asishukunyiswa kalula yizifiso zesikhashana.
• Kuthuthukisa ukusebenza komsebenzinjengoba kukhuthaza ukukhiqiza, impilo yomsebenzi kanye nobudlelwano obuhle namakhasimende kanye nozakwabo.
• Ncipha ukucindezeleka futhi kuyasivikela kukho. Indlela esichaza ngayo okwenzeka kithi inganciphisa amazinga ethu okucindezeleka.
• Kuthuthukisa ubudlelwano phakathi kwabantungokuqonda kangcono imizwa yethu neyabanye.
• Khulisa ukukhula komuntu siqungoba iyithuluzi eliyinhloko ezinqubweni zentuthuko kanye noshintsho.
• Kwandisa ugqozi kanye nokuqinaokusisiza ukuthi siqhubeke nemigomo yesikhathi eside.
• Kuthuthukisa inhlalakahle yengqondo., njengoba kunegalelo empilweni yangaphakathi ezinzile neyanelisayo.

Thola amakhono akho ngokuhlolwa

Njenge-IQ, kunezinhlobo eziningana ukuhlolwa kobuhlakani bemizwa esingazithola kuyo yonke i-inthanethi. Kodwa-ke, kungcono ukubonisana nochwepheshe ongenza ukuhlolwa komuntu siqu, kunokuba wenze ukuhlolwa okuvamile ozokuthola ku-inthanethi.

Noma ngabe ungabaza, lezi zivivinyo zingakunika umbono wokuthi liphi izinga lakho le-IE, ngakho-ke kungakuhle ukwenze njalo. Vele, ngoba izivivinyo zinokukhetha okuningi, kufanele uthembeke ngangokunokwenzeka futhi uzame ukuhlaziya ngempela ukuthi ukuphendula kwakho kungaba njani emacaleni athile; Ngale ndlela kuphela lapho uzofinyelela umphumela onembe kakhudlwana.

Ngaphandle kwezivivinyo ezisemthethweni, ungenza nohlobo oluthile ukuzihlola okunekhwalithi ukubheka ukuthi imishwana yangaphakathi noma yangaphandle efana nale elandelayo ivela empilweni yakho yansuku zonke:

• "Ngingakwazi ukubhekana nalokhu": kubonisa ikhono lokulawula imizwa ezimweni ezinzima."
• "Ngingathuthuka, nawe ungathuthuka.": kubonisa umbono omuhle kanye nomqondo wokukhula."
• "Ngijabule ngalolu shintsho": kubonisa ukuzivumelanisa nezimo kanye nokuvuleleka kokusha."
• "Uzizwa kanjani?"Noma"Wenza kahle?": Zibonisa uzwela kanye nokuqwashisa umphakathi."
• "Singakwazi ukuxazulula lokhu": kwembula amakhono okuphatha izingxabano kanye nokubambisana."

Uma lezi zinhlobo zokubonakaliswa ziyingxenye yakho ingxoxo yansuku zonkeCishe usuvele usebenzisa amakhono amaningana okuhlakanipha kwemizwa.

Ukuhlakanipha okungokomzwelo ezinganeni, ezinkampanini nakumanethiwekhi omphakathi

Ngenxa yokuthandwa kwayo, kuye kwenziwa izifundo eziningi ngalesi sihloko emikhakheni eyahlukene. Phakathi kwazo, okuvelele kakhulu ukulawula imizwa ephethwe yi... izingane, the abasebenzi futhi i abasebenzisi bezokuxhumanaSizohlola ngokujulile ngayinye yalezi zimo.

1. Izingane

I-Los izingane kudingeka kube abafundile ngokomzwelo ukuze bakwazi ukuthuthukisa izakhi ezishiwo ngenhla futhi ngaleyo ndlela bakwazi ukulawula imizwa yabo nokuqonda eyabanye ukuze babe nobudlelwano bomuntu siqu, njengoba sesibonile, obubaluleke kakhulu.

Nokho, i ukuhlakanipha ngokomzwelo ezinganeni Ngokuvamile kufundwa ngokuzijwayeza, okungukuthi, ngokusebenzisa kwakho empilweni yangempela. Lezi zifundo zingaqiniswa ngosizo lomndeni nesikole, ngakho-ke sincoma okulandelayo:

• bafundise lawula intukuthelo vele uqaphele ukuthi kunezindlela zokusabela okufanele uzigweme.
• Babonise ukuthi yini imizwa evame kakhulu nokuthi ungazibona kanjani kwabanye abantu, ukuze bakwazi ukuthuthukisa uzwela.
• bafundise ukuqamba imizwa ukuthi bazizwa kanjani ezimweni ezithile.
• Babonise amasu azobavumela ukuveza nokubhekana nemizwa noma imizwa (ukudweba, ukubhala, ukukhuluma, ukunyakaza).
• Khuthaza ukuxhumana okuvulekile ukuze bazizwe bekhululekile ukuveza imibono yabo, ukunikeza imibono yabo, noma yini enye abayizwayo noma abayicabangayo.
• Ukuguqula ukuhlola ngokomzwelo kube ukudlala (isibonelo, ukuqagela imizwa ebusweni, ukusebenzisa izindaba noma amamuvi ukukhuluma ngalokho abalingiswa abakuzwayo).

Ngokusho kothisha abahlukahlukene, "ukwenza ukuhlola imizwa yakho kube umdlalo" kuwumdlalo enye yezindlela ezinhle kakhulu ukufaka umoya wokuhlakanipha ngokomzwelo ezinganeni.

2. Izinkampani

Ucwaningo lwe-EI nocwaningo oluhlobene nendawo yebhizinisi kuveze imiphumela yesasasa elikhulu, kusukela abasebenzi abanobuhlakani bemizwa Bakhiqiza kakhulu futhi bajabule kakhulu. Ngokwemininingwane eqoqwe, laba basebenzi, abakwazi ukulawula imizwa yabo nokuqaphela eyamakhasimende abo, banekhono elikhulu lokuthengisa imikhiqizo nezinsizakalo nokwakha ubudlelwano obuhlala njalo.

Lokhu kuholele ekutheni abasebenzi abanobuhlakani obukhulu bemizwa badingeke kakhulu yizinkampani, njengoba bedinga abantu abakwaziyo ukubhekana nezimo ezinzima ngokuzimisela kanye nesimo sengqondo esihle. Ngakho-ke, izinkampani seziqalile ukwenza lokhu:

• Qaphela ukuhlolwa kwamakhono emizwa lapho ukhetha ukuthi obani abazoba yingxenye yethimba lomsebenzi.
• Okunikezwayo ukuqeqeshwa kwamakhono athambile njengobuholi, ukuphathwa kwezingxabano, ukuxhumana, kanye nokuqina.
• Ukwazisa abaholi babo imisho kanye nezimo zengqondo ezifana nokuthi “Ake sibone ukuthi singasebenzisana kanjani.","Angiqiniseki ukuthi kwenzekani, ungangichazela?"Noma"Ngitshele okwengeziwe", okubonisa ukulalela ngozwela kanye nokuzimisela ukubambisana.

Ezindaweni zomsebenzi, ukuhlakanipha ngokomzwelo kuhlotshaniswa nalokhu:

• Ngaphansi ukucindezeleka nokukhathala.
• Okungcono isimo sezulu seqembu kanye nomuzwa wokuba yingxenye (“siyasekelana”).
• Mayor ukuzivumelanisa nezimo izinguquko zenhlangano.
• Ubuholi obunobuntu kakhulu, okuxhumana nabantu hhayi nemiphumela kuphela.

I-3 Amanethiwekhi omphakathi

Imithombo yezokuxhumana ingenye indlela yokuxhumana, ngakho-ke ingaba wusizo kwezinye izici ezihlobene nokuhlakanipha ngokomzwelo. Nakuba kungenziwanga ucwaningo oluningi ngakho njengasezindaweni zemfundo noma zomsebenzi, kunezici ezithile ezithakazelisayo:

• Abantu ezinkundleni zokuxhumana bavame ukuba ngaphezulu ukuveza imizwaLokho okuthunyelwe okubonisa izimo ezinzima, ubuthakathaka, noma impumelelo yomuntu siqu kuvame ukudala ukuxhumana okuningi.
• Ngesikhathi esifanayo, i- ukushesha kanye nokungaziwa amanethiwekhi ahlobene angenza kube lula ukusabela ngokungacabangi (amazwana anolaka, ukuqhathanisa okuqhubekayo, umona), ngakho-ke ukuthuthukisa ukuzithiba nozwela kubaluleke kakhulu kule ndawo.
• Ezinkampanini, izinzuzo ze-IE zisobala kakhulu uma kukhulunywa ngazo phatha imidiya yezenhlaloKubavumela ukuthi balalele amakhasimende abo kakhudlwana, bamukele ukugxekwa, baphendule ngokuthula, babe nombono omuhle futhi babhekane namaqiniso kuye ngesimo, bathuthukise izidingo zezilaleli eziqondiwe, phakathi kwezinye izinto.

Abasebenzisi abahlakaniphile ngokomzwelo bavame ukuzibuza imibuzo efana nale: “Uzizwa kanjani lo muntu?”, “Iyini inhloso yalokhu kuphawula?”, “Le nethiwekhi ingenza ngizizwe kanjani futhi yimiphi imingcele okudingeka ngiyibeke?”, okusiza ukuthi ukunciphisa amathuba ukugwema ukungqubuzana noma ukungakhululeki.

Indima yesiko, ubuciko, kanye nemidlalo yevidiyo emizweni

Ngaphezu kwemfundo ehlelekile kanye nobudlelwano bobuso nobuso, Ezinye iziteshi zifaka umculo, amafilimu, ngisho nemidlalo yevidiyo ethile. Zithonya ubuhlakani bethu bemizwa, njengoba zivuselela futhi zibumba umhlaba wethu othinta inhliziyo.

Isibonelo, umculo unethonya elikhulu emizweni yabantu. Ukulalela izingoma ezithile kungakusiza ukuthi lawula isimo sakho sengqondophatha izinkumbulo ezibuhlungu noma uthuthukise isisusa sakho ngaphambi kwenselele. Ukusebenzisa uhlu lwadlalwayo ngamabomu kuyithuluzi elilula lokuqeqesha ikhono lakho lokwenza shintsha imizwa yakho ngokushintsha ukugxila kwakho ekunakeniLokhu kuhlobene kakhulu nalokho okushiwo yimisho efana nokuthi "shintsha ukunaka kwakho futhi uzoshintsha imizwa yakho".

Ngisho neminye imidlalo yevidiyo yesimanje ifaka izici ze- ukuqaphela, ukubambisana kanye nokukhetha okuhleLe misebenzi ingaba amathuluzi awusizo okusebenzisa ukulawula imizwa kanye nozwela uma isetshenziswa ngokuhlakanipha. Ukukhetha imidlalo ekhuthaza ukuzindla kanye nokusebenzisana, bese uxoxa ngalokho okuzwiwe nokufundiwe, kungaba yindlela ejabulisayo yokuqinisa ubuhlakani bemizwa, ikakhulukazi entsheni.

Imisho yobuhlakani bemizwa okufanele uyiqonde futhi uyisebenzise

Ekugcineni, kunokuthile okufunwe kakhulu futhi lokho kungene Izinsiza zokuzisiza Sihlala sizimisele ukuqoqa, yibo imisho mayelana nokuhlakanipha kwemizwaLezi zisho zenzelwe ukusisiza sicabange ngezenzo zethu zansuku zonke kanye nokusebenzisana kwethu nabantu abasizungezile, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi bayabajwayele noma abantu esingabazi. Sithemba ukuthi nizokujabulela lokho.

Izingcaphuno zakudala mayelana nokuhlakanipha ngokomzwelo

• Uma ufisa ukujabula, kufanele uzinikele ekuboneni abanye bejabule. Bertrand Russell
• Inkinga ukuthi uma ungaphili impilo yakho, abanye abantu bazokwenzela wena. UPeter Shaffer
• Amandla okuzimisela yinhloso ethonywa imizwa. URaheel Farooq
• Uma ufunda lokhu… Halala, uyaphila. Uma lokho kungeyona into yokumamatheka, khona-ke angazi ukuthi kuyini. UChad Sugg
• Isibonakaliso esihle kakhulu sobuntu bomuntu yindlela abaphatha ngayo abantu abangenakubenzela okuhle, kanye nendlela abaphatha ngayo abantu abangakwazi ukuzivikela. Abigail Van Buren
• Umuntu ohlakaniphile angakwazi ukucabanga nganoma yini; umuntu ohlakaniphile akazami nokuzama. UJen Knox
• Ngomqondo ongokoqobo, sonke sinengqondo ezimbili, enye ecabangayo nenye ezwayo. Daniel Goleman
• Yilokho okubalulekile ngezifundo; uhlala ufunda kuzo, noma ngabe awufuni. cecelia ahern
• Ukucabanga ngento ethile akuyenzi ibe yiqiniso. Ukufuna into ethile akuyenzi ibe ngokoqobo. UMichelle Hodkin
• Yonke imizwa inendawo yayo, kodwa akufanele iphazamise isenzo esifanele. USusan Oakey-Baker

• Kuyamangalisa ukuthi, uma ingqondo isikhululekile ekungcolisweni ngokomzwelo, kuvela ukucabanga nokucaca. Clyde DeSouza
• Uzwela lweqiniso alusho nje kuphela ukuzwa ubuhlungu babanye, kodwa futhi nokwenza okuthile ukuze kuncishiswe ubuhlungu. Daniel Goleman
• Sikhohlwa kalula ukuthi yini esibangela ubuhlungu. Graham Green
• Osomabhizinisi baseNtshonalanga bavame ukwehluleka ukuqaphela ukubaluleka kokwakha ubudlelwano nabantu. Daniel Goleman
• Isenzo ngasinye sokufunda ngokuqaphela sidinga ukuzimisela ukulimaza ukuzethemba komuntu. Yingakho izingane ezincane zifunda ngokushesha kangaka ngaphambi kokuba ziqaphele ukubaluleka kwazo. Thomas Szasz
• Ukuzazi wena kungukuqala kokuhlakanipha konke. I-Aristotle
• Angikhathali ukuthi uthini kimi. Ngikhathala ngalokho owabelana nami ngakho. USantosh Kalwar
• Ubuchopho obungokomzwelo busabela ngokushesha kakhulu emcimbini kunobuchopho obunengqondo. Daniel Goleman
• Shintsha ukugxila kwakho uzoshintsha imizwa yakho. Shintsha imizwa yakho bese ukugxila kwakho kuzoshintsha. UFrederick Dodson

• Ikhono lethu lokuzivumelanisa nezimo liyamangalisa. Ikhono lethu lokushintsha liyamangalisa. ULiza Lutz
• Akusikho ukucindezeleka okusenza siwe, kodwa yindlela esisabela ngayo ezimweni ezicindezelayo. UWayde Goodall
• Ukuphela kwendlela yokushintsha umqondo womuntu ukuxhumana naye ngenhliziyo. URasheed Ogunlaru
• Isibindi sibaluleke kakhulu kuzo zonke izimfanelo ezinhle, ngoba ngaphandle kwesibindi, asikho esinye isici esihle esingaguquguquki esingasetshenziswa. Maya Angelou
• Uma ulwa nawe ukuze uthole ubuwena bangempela, uzothola ukuthi munye kuphela onqobayo. UStephen Richards
• Hamba njengengonyama, khuluma njengejuba, phila njengendlovu, futhi uthande njengengane encane. USantosh Kalwar
• Enye indlela yokwandisa amandla ethu okuzimisela ukufunda ukuphatha iziphazamiso zethu esikhundleni sokuzivumela ukuthi zisilawule. Daniel Goleman
• Ungesabi ukwesaba kwakho. Azikho lapho ukukwesabisa. Zikhona lapho ukukwazisa ukuthi kukhona okubalulekile. C. JoyBell C.

Imisho eveza ukuhlakanipha kwemizwa ebudlelwaneni

Ezinye izinkulumo zansuku zonke ziyiqiniso izimpawu zokuhlakanipha okukhulu ngokomzwelo, ikakhulukazi emkhakheni wobudlelwano bomuntu siqu:

• "Ngenze iphutha": kubonisa ukuzazi, umthwalo wemfanelo, kanye nokuzethemba okunempilo.
• "Ingabe ulungile?": kubonisa ukuqwashisa umphakathi kanye nokuzwela ezinkombeni ezingezona ezezwi.
• "Unelungelo lokuzizwa ngale ndlela": iveza uzwela kanye nokuqinisekiswa ngokomzwelo.
• "Ngingasiza kanjani?": kubonisa isisusa sokubambisana nabantu kanye nokuzimisela ukubambisana.

Ukufaka lawa mabinzana empilweni yakho yansuku zonke kuyindlela eqondile yokuzijwayeza i-EI, ngoba kuyakuphoqa ukuthi ukubheka ngaphakathi kakade xhumana nezwe lemizwa labanye.

Indlela yokuqeqesha amakhono ayisihluthulelo obuhlakani bemizwa

Ngokusho kwababhali abaningi abalandela indlela kaGoleman yokucabanga, ukuhlakanipha kwemizwelo kulawulwa yizinto eziningana izizinda namakhono aqeqeshwayoNakuba amamodeli ahlukene ekhuluma ngamakhono athile angu-4, 8 noma angu-12, umqondo oyinhloko uyafana: Awuzalwanga une-EI ehleliwe, ingathuthukiswa.

Ngezansi kukhonjiswa izibonelo zamakhono kanye nemisho ehlobene nayo:

• Ukuzithiba: "Ngingakwazi ukubhekana nalokhuKusho ukungavumeli intukuthelo noma ukukhathazeka kunqobe.
• Umbono omuhle: "Ngingathuthuka, nawe ungathuthuka.Kukusiza ukuthi ungayeki lapho ubhekene nezingqinamba.
• Ukuguquguquka: "Ngijabule kakhulu ngalolu shintsho.Kusikhuthaza ukuthi sibheke izinguquko njengamathuba.
• Ukuqondiswa kwempumelelo: "Yilokhu okubaluleke ngempelaKukugcina ugxile ezintweni eziza kuqala kuwe.
• Ukuzazi: "Nginale micabango ngoba…Kukukhuthaza ukuthi uhlole imvelaphi yengxoxo yakho yangaphakathi.
• Uzwela: "Ngiyakuqonda futhi ngiyakukhathalelaKukhulisa ubudlelwano obujulile nobethembanayo.
• Ukuqwashisa ngenhlangano: "Nansi indlela izinto ezisebenza ngayo laphaKukusiza ukuthi uqondise amaqembu nezinkampani ngobuhlakani.
• Ithonya: "Kuthiwani uma uzama ukukwenza ngale ndlela?"Kusikisela ngaphandle kokuphoqelela."
• Ubuholi Obukhuthazayo: "Lokho kusho lukhulu ngoba…Kunikeza incazelo nenhloso izenzo.
• Ukulawula ukungqubuzana: "Singakwazi ukuxazulula lokhu"Kuvula umnyango wezixazululo ezizuzisayo zombili."
• Umsebenzi wethimba: "Siyasekelana"Kuqinisa ukuphepha kwengqondo kweqembu."
• Ukuqeqesha nokuqondisa: "Lokhu kungakusizaYabelana ngolwazi lwakho ngaphandle kokuphoqelela amaqiniso akho.

Enye indlela ewusizo yokuthuthukisa i-EI yakho iwukuba khetha ikhono elilodwa noma amabili Khetha indawo ofuna ukuyithuthukisa (isibonelo, ukuzithiba nozwela) bese uzibophezela ekusebenziseni ngobuqotho eminye yemisho ehlobene nayo nsuku zonke. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, ukucabanga kwakho nemizwa yakho kuzohambisana nalezi zindlela ezintsha zokuziveza.

Ngeshwa, lokhu kuyisiphetho salokhu okuthunyelwe, kodwa ungakhathazeki, sizongena ngokujulile kulesi sihloko esithakazelisayo kamuva. Ukuhlakanipha ngokomzwelo kuyikhono lokuphila konke: lapho ukuhlakulela kakhulu, kulapho kuthinta khona inhlalakahle yakho, izinqumo zakho, kanye nekhwalithi yobudlelwano bakho. Sithemba ukuthi uzokujabulela okuqukethwe, futhi njengenjwayelo, uma ungathanda ukufaka isandla noma unemibuzo, sicela usebenzise isigaba sokuphawula ngezansi. Sikukhuthaza futhi ukuthi wabelane ngalesi sihloko ezinkundleni zakho zokuxhumana, njengoba kuzosiza abanye bafunde ngalolu hlobo lokuhlakanipha.